The Actual Meaning of Love, and Why I Hate the English Language

Alright, I've had it. I was once a culprit, but I am now going to be a different man. I feel that the meaning of the word love in the English language has been degraded to a non-functional point, and I need to put a stop to it.

love

   [luhv]  Show IPA noun, verb, loved, lov·ing.

noun

1.

a profoundly tender, passionate affection for anotherperson.

2.

a feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection, as for a parent, child, or friend.

3.

sexual passion or desire.

4.

a person toward whom love is felt; beloved person;sweetheart.

5.

(used in direct address as a term of endearment, affection,or the like): Would you like to see a movie, love?

The English language is incomplete and folly, as well as not obeying any rules set forward by anybody but itself- sort of like the many countries that speak it. But, there is a point where there has to be another word. I am in love with my girlfriend, Lejana. I love her. This is a serious form of this word that means something emotional. And then, facebook contains billions of females, males, and whatevers saying "I love you" "I love this" "I LOOOVE THAT" etc. For what purpose and reason is there no standard whereby to measure the form of liking you have for an object other than the word 'love'?


When the Savior speaks to Peter in the New Testament, and asks if Peter "loves" him, it should read differently, and then a pastor speaks of this whole situation in this way:


The true meaning of love, as defined in the Bible, has been corrupted in the common usage of our English language and society. Most often, love is confused with infatuation - that elated, "high" feeling we get when we "fall in love". This kind of "love" is something that lasts typically less than a year, and unless replaced by true love, results in broken relationships...The Greek language (the language of the New Testament) uses two different words to describe and define love. The most commonly used Greek word translated "love" in the New Testament is "agape." This love is represented by God's love for us. It is a non-partial, sacrificial love probably best exemplified by God's provision for our rebellion:

"For God so loved (agape) the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish, but have eternal life." (John 3:16)

The gift³ of God's son as a provision for sin⁴ was given to all humans,⁵ regardless of who we are.⁶ God's love is unconditional.⁷

In contrast, our love is usually conditional and based upon how other people behave toward us. This kind of love is based upon familiarity and direct interaction. The Greek word "phileo" defines this kind of love, often translated "brotherly love." Phileo is a soulish (connected through our emotions) kind of love - something that can be experienced by both believers and non-believers. This is in contrast to agape, which is love extended through the spirit. Agape love requires a relationship with God through Jesus Christ, since the non-regenerated soul is unable to love unconditionally. Agape love gives and sacrifices expecting nothing back in return.⁸

(http://www.godandscience.org/love/what_is_love.html)

I have to agree here with the self proclaimed Pastor Deem. What a beautiful way to show the Savior's love for us, but in contrast, how sad it is that we don't truly understand how powerful this word is, and it is strewn about as though it has no value.

There is a quote that has been circulating the internet, one that I think stands out in this situation:

"As sex got easier to get, love has gotten harder to find"

--Anonymous

The world is becoming a place of values that are confused with all sorts of worldly ideals. It is hard to understand how much someone cares for us when someone tells us they love us if the word, and the idea means nothing to us as human beings. Satan has been able to corrupt homes, to tear apart families, to dispand all things that were good, because of counterfeiting principles, ideals, and morals. I REFUSE to let him take the one thing that reminds us why we do things for others- the idea of love. Jesus Christ died because he loved us. He did that so that we could one day stand before God, and beg for the Atonement of the Savior to allow us into His presence. That kind of love is sacred, and powerful, and CANNOT be mistaken; and while the world degrades love, I will not lose it's identity in my mind.

I will no longer use the word love as a description of something that pleases me, nor use it in a way that degrades it's meaning. I ask you to band with me.

--Brack

Iconic Images and Their Degradation of the Female Gender

This idea was brought to my attention tonight as I spoke with three friends of mine about varying issues of the female gender. These three friends are all of that gender, and all three of them were talking to me about different angles of life, and their individual pursuits of happiness. As I listened, and discussed differing ideas during this conversation, as well as drawing from a general overall read of girls as of recently, I discovered that there is a general disposition of the female gender that somehow indicates that they are "not good enough" and that they aren't what they are supposed to be, which causes a general outlook of pessimism. Though that looks like a long run-on sentence, that's exactly how it's come across as it's been looked at.

I've pondered this idea for a long time. Why do girls have this idea that they are not good enough? If anything, guys should be the ones that have this outlook- girls have amazing traits: the ability to care, the ability to love, the capacity to heal. Guys don't have these traits in general. The female gender in itself makes these creatures remarkable. Creatures isn't the right word. Women in general have the overall ability to be better. Their inner beauty, and abilities far surpass that of the male gender, but, for centuries, men have ruled the world. They have had control of what women think, how they dress, how they are "supposed" to look, etc.

Because of this male pressure, women feel like they have to meet the requirements set, or they won't be able to receive the attention that they want. Marilyn Monroe was a key part in the current movement of iconic imagery. Women since Marilyn have felt as though they have to match up to her style, and her scanty amount of robage. It's been a down-hill trend, and continues to curb downwards. Very few people can escape the inadequacy they feel when they are being compared to the icons of the world.

However, this iconic imagery, displayed through television, movies, music, pictures, tumblr, etc. has literally degraded the outlook of females on the world today. Very few females that I have talked to in the past 3 years are happy with who they are. Granted, there are many struggles in the world; monetary issues, familial problems, work, and others- but the iconic imagery generated by the media is a social norm that degrades the ability of females to see themselves as what they can be, and what they are. Instead of looking in the mirror, and seeing the goodness, and the incredible accomplishments they have met, they compare themselves to that imagery, and can't seem to find the comparisons.

There is not a single reason that anybody should feel inadequate. Comparisons aren't fair to anybody. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder- beauty can be seen in any sense, and any light. Just because the world thinks that everyone should look like media-worshipped unrealistically built stars doesn't mean it's required. There is so much more in the world that matters than looks, and gaudy prowess. Life is more than a dog-eat-dog competition to be the most beautiful. Life is meant to discover who we are- deciding who we want to be, what we want our legacy to be, and how we want to be remembered, and then going out and doing it.

So this is my message to all the girls in the world, and I hope many will see it. Don't let anyone else tell you what, and who you should be ever again. There is so much ability, and capability in each and every one of you. Beauty isn't a general decision, it's an action, and it's created by you. Love who you are, and love will find you.

--Brack

The Plot Thickens

It's late. I'm currently in the middle of dealing with a few points of frustration on multiple fronts that have occurred from bad communication on my part. It sucks when you're the one that messes everything up on a consistent basis because you can't figure out how to communicate. I feel, often, that I would have made a magnificent court jester in the olden days. All I'd have to do is open my mouth, and the idiocy would probably just naturally come.

That's right, check out the awesome costume I would have worn!

Today is a game day as well. We play Chaminade tonight, which is a big game for us. These inter-island games are huge. The teams and the refs seem to have a lot of stake in these games for some reason. It's going to be a lot of fun, and I can't wait to play!

That's all for now. It's bedtime.

2 Months? I'm Back Now!

It was brought to my attention today that I haven't posted for a while. I looked at the dates, and I realized that the last post was on November 11th of last year, and that will simply not do. So, I'm sitting in Accounting 201- possibly the most dry, counterintuitive, and boring class in the entire universe, and I'm catching up on the events of the new year, and everything in between.

The basketball season is picking up steam. Our team is looking very, very good, and we are finally achieving the success that we have strived for since the beginning of the season. Our team has been slightly restructured- we are no running 4 guards out, and one big in; I guess Wagner didn't like me playing on the outside that much, but, it has really boosted our ability to run the floor, and play inside-out.

Christmas was good. I got to spend time with my family, and it's always nice to be around them. We had a lot of fun. My sister Marquelle blew out her other knee, which has been a real downer for her, but she's been a super trooper for the most part. ACL injuries suck. I've had one, this is her second. Patience is thin, frustration is high, and the world feels like it's falling in on you. She had a really good disposition for the most of the holiday, and I was so glad that that's what she decided to throw in her outlook. My dad and mom were fun. They made the break very fun, and entertaining. Jaysa looked good, and was her fun, exciting self. We also got to go up and visit the whole family, and that was incredibly fun.

Lejana and I were able to spend New Year's together. For those of my readers who don't know who Lejana is, she is my girlfriend. She's amazing- been a wonderful influence on me, and helps me become better every day. I want to be a better person because I know her. We went night swimming with a large group of kids. I of course kissed her at midnight, the first kiss of our new year... Then I dropped her. That was embarrassing. I suppose I should've thought that one through. But it was a great night, and we had a lot of fun.

So now school is back in session. That's going to be brutal. I hate school. I hate the pointlessness of 90% of the classes we are told to take by people who think that we need to "broaden our view of horizons and courses one can take". I know the course I want to take, and I can guarantee that biology is not anywhere near it :P

So, here it is the start of the new year. I'll post my resolutions in the next couple of days.

Game day tomorrow! I'm super excited =D

-Brack

The Most Amazing Reception I've EVER seen

This is incredible

Trust/My Shortcomings

The topic of trust has come up quite frequently in the past couple of days for me, and I thought that I would share some thoughts, and ramble a little while I'm thinking about it, mostly to calm me down, and also to get my thoughts somewhere where I can organize them.

Trust: 1 firm belief in the reliability, truth, ability, or strength of someone or something

Trust is such an abstract idea, that is hard to develop and use, I think. It's easy to believe someone, and it's easy to allow someone inside of certain areas of your life- but to develop a true bond of trust is so incredibly difficult, at least for me. To have a firm belief in the reliability, truth, ability, or strength of another person has often required proof of purchase for me. I'm not willing to give trust freely to be injured by that decision moments, days, or weeks later. It's almost impossible, in a sense, to win my trust unless something has been done to show me that one deserves such things.

The problem here is that maybe I'm the only one. Maybe I truly am a skeptic. I'm a person that can't see anything good, and only imagines the worst-case scenario of any given event. If I am the only one that does this, then I understand how ridiculous I sound right now. But it feels like these walls that have been built up over time to protect me, aren't going to come down without purpose, and without reason.

And then, there is a basketball team. Our BYUH basketball team. And one of the key components of any team is trust. Without trust, there is no such thing as team. You have to have a firm belief in the reliability of the four guys on the floor with you, or you can't accomplish anything great. And so for all the years that I've hidden behind my walls, and protection, through which few have ever reached- I know I'm supposed to drop all that for my teammates, and it's been an extremely difficult task. Trust is so important, and I need to get to the point where I have the utmost faith in my teammates, and I allow them to do what they do, and stop trying to micromanage.

I've started to notice recently, and my mother has pointed out that I'm an angry person. That I carry a lot of anger around with me, and that it sometimes rubs off on those I care about.




I have my demons. Life has been a lot more difficult as I grow into this new phase of existence. I can't help but feel alone, and pained at the simplest of things sometimes. My anger boils over simple things, and sometimes, it feels like it consumes me, and I don't know what to do, or where to put it. Sometimes I feel so alone on these things, like nobody cares or understands- that I'm just a wretch with no hope, and there is nothing I can do about it; and then I feel isolated, because nobody really understands what I'm going through-

And then I realize that I don't take time to realize what everyone else is going through. I'm so absorbed and fixated with trying to figure out what to do about my crap, and so consumed with being angry about it, and trying to prove some God-forsaken point that I lose sight of what's important, and I piss off those around me, and frustrate those that care, and become unsure of what course I am on.

It's a vicious cycle that I've been living, and it literally is murdering me from the inside. What am I supposed to do? How do I fix all of these things that ail me. Thank God I'm not dealing with cancer, or with some other ailment that would inhibit my life in ways that I just hope never happen to anyone- but how do I fix this mess... this rut that I'm in? I don't know. I have tried to figure it out for years. I've read every article I could get my hands on. I've tried switching locale, trying to read and attempt, exercises, mind games- you name it. And still, I sit here, and I don't know what I'm supposed to do with all of these insane emotions that pour through me, and give me no rest.

This is my battle. And I feel so underprepared, and  small when it comes to it. I can dawn my sword, and stand before the army of countless numbers, and I still feel, at the end of the day, that I have accomplished absolutely nothing sometimes.

I don't know what the next step is. I'm scared. It's been this way for so long, and I don't know whether I am going to continue falling into this horrid black abyss, or if randomly this light bulb will turn on above my head, and I'll just gather all of my strength, and defeat it. I want so badly to feel like a person again, not a walking emotional basket case. I want Bracken back.

Central Washington Game Thoughts

There are days where you look at yourself in the mirror, and you look at the way you contributed to whatever happened that day, and you want to spit at yourself and walk away. That's how I felt after the BYU game. I felt like I played selfishly, and didn't use the tools our team had to function. Maybe I'm wrong, but playing the position today, I have to be the guy the moves the team. It's always felt that way- the energy that I bring to the floor is contagious- and sometimes, as in the BYU game, it can be a hazard.

However, tonight was a different story, and we looked like a different team. The ball was shared well. I feel like looking at the way we played, we have a chance to do a lot of special things. Regardless of that, we failed in a couple of areas which led us to a one point defeat by Central Washington.


First off, I feel like our defensive rotation was absolutely pathetic on baseline drives. We would let the guards get to the baseline, and then when the bigs would step to help, it seemed like their guards would shoot, but our guards didn't switch off to their bigs, and we gave up a ton of boards, and they scored plentifully on second chance points, and that hurts when you are trying to protect the lead.

Secondly, I feel like we made poor decisions on offense. There was pressure, really good pressure in fact. The pressure was very intense, but it wasn't something that couldn't be handled. And, when we had the tiniest bit of pressure applied, all of us, including myself, would press the panic button, and toss the ball into an abyss of the wrong team's hands... And it cost us the game ultimately.


Thirdly, I feel like we are gelling as a team. We seem to have learned a lot from the BYU game, and it was extremely visible on the floor tonight. We looked like an actual team. The game was fun, and exciting, and I couldn't have asked for a better atmosphere. However, I do wish the results were different.


I'm back to where I was last season, struggling to put the 3 ball down. I don't know where that comes from because I feel like I am a good three point shooter. I guess that comes from having the confidence to rain 3's when I need to, and I don't know where that confidence fell to. But playing inside out is becoming a strength for us and me, so we'll keep hitting that until my 3's decide they would like to drop.

So, I suppose I'll continue trying to learn, and trying to play better. Life goes on. Big game tomorrow, and we've got to go get this one. We can't afford any more losses this year.




--Brack